Parallel Universe Vs. Present Plight

Its been long overdue and if you happen to be following me on Facebook and Twitter....I would firstly like to say a big Thank You for not only suffering me on those channels but also having the courage to come and read my blabber more on this platform, and secondly point out my latest obsession on Parallel Universe. Now, if you are confused about or want to know what parallel universe is, this is definitely not the place where you will find that information. So the poor people who Google'd  parallel universe and skipped 70 pages of results to land here are going to be slightly disappointed and well for them I suggest a quick course on "Google for Idiots". So the parallel universe.....in short its the universe which exists where everything you screw up here goes smoothly there, where there are no Monday blues and everyday is a weekend. Where the sun shines and things go as they should.....as they were supposed to go - Perfectly! Yes, it is that fantasy world you wish that existed yet know that all its ever going to be is that thought in your head. So, why am I going on about this you ask.....well for one I can and secondly I have to get over this obsession and so this is where I get rid of all things.....watch that step.
Now lets just account on some of the things which we know would and would not happen in the parallel universe. In the parallel universe the weekends would definitely last longer and Mondays would be the fun day not the mourn day. Your wishes would be granted faster than Aladdin could rub the magic lamp to prompt the Genie. The Genie in the parallel universe would still be as cool.....you can't mess with him coz like it or not you'll never ever get a friend like him. There would be no waiting for hours to receive a reply to a simple text and a "Hey! How are you?" would mean and be taken as "Hey! How are you?". Where life wouldn't be so complicated to the point where your mind just wants to shut down and kill you and where happiness is actually something widespread. Where you can eat any amount of chocolate and sweets without a care in the world and dentists would only exists in fairy tales. Where you wouldn't have to sell your soul to make some cash which ultimately goes back to the entity you sold the soul to.
So this is the point where I am brought back to reality with the whole "But Asif...what would be the point of it all if everything was hunky dory...we would not appreciate it if we had everything....blaah blaah blaah blaah blaah". Seriously in the parallel universe people who say that would be kicked up their backside for being too realistic, for its only a realm of thoughts in our heads and if we can't think of all the positive things without bringing in the exceptions then what's the point of having a parallel universe at all.
So to bring a bit of your parallel universe into this one....do keep smiling! :)

How Stupid is Stupid?

Now none of us can ever say we haven't done anything stupid but lets just ask the question for its out there in the open anyways - How much stupidity does it actually take to make something stupid actually very stupid? I mean getting into a dare at the age of six where you ring some random neighbours door bell at midnight and run like a wild dog is chasing you is kinda stupid but fun. Jumping off a height and thinking you can make it to the ground without a scratch is going a bit further but less fun in hindsight. Getting drunk and trying to steal a penguin from a theme park on the other hand is plain old stupid and that is exactly what two British lads from  tried to do and actually succeeded. Now, I have done pretty stupid things and will continue on doing them as time goes on, but the thought of stealing a penguin or any animal would never ever cross my mind. 

Stupidity is a word that made its way into the English language in 1541, yes we have been officially being termed stupid for quite a few centuries now and have done ourselves no favour whatsoever as time has passed. In fact we may have lowered the standards even more with each century passing by and have come to the era where common sense is more of a privilege skill than an inbuilt functionality. I have never met anyone who hasn't ever tried to touch their tongue on the tip of a battery even though we have seen someone else try it and wince. The fact that reality shows now play such a big factor in our lives is all but a statement depicting our lack of intelligence - how can people making themselves look like idiots become celebrity is a thought that keeps me wondering where the human race is headed. The fact that these shows have insane followers who believe everything that happens on the show and would argue with you if you ever criticised it is what makes me believe that if the Aliens ever invaded our planet they would either -

 

a. Kill themselves for making such a long and labour-intensive trip to conquer a planet that is full of batter licking, penguin stealing, scripted reality shows watching people who would probably kill themselves if you gave them a good spiel about how it would help cure them of something made up on the fly.  

b. Go back to their planet and kill the person who came up with the idea of them travelling all the way to planet earth which is inhabited by loonies who would pay to watch people knock themselves out and go circles in a car going at about 300kmph without a reason.

So the next time you see something stupid, hold up, pay attention, laugh at it, laugh at the person who is doing it and walk on for who knows while you are doing it there may be and the chances are pretty high that someone else would be looking at you laughing.

Till next keep doing stupid things and keep smiling! :)

The Insane Institution called Earth

So the world has got crazier as the years have gone by. This thought has been troubling me since a couple of years and no it doesn't come out like this any given time in my head, no there is always a build up which brings me to this line that "Shit! The world has become a crazier place!". So why am I going on about this you may ask and that is a very valid question since you have made it all the way here to go through another 10 minutes of my verbal distress, and that is not just from me misplacing my verbs and using the adverbs incorrectly. No, I have very valid reasons to start scribbling this thought over digitally (I did previously did the old school method of writing it on a notepad and then reading it and then copying the whole thing here but then I have started to feel a bit ashamed of my abusing those trees that went into creating papers....a sign of growing up I guess....and a lot of other hope) as it affects us all and am sure there have been several instances where you have thought of the same thing but haven't said it out aloud just in case people start looking at you as that lunatic who shouts about the world coming to an end and I mean in the non-hollywood style. Naah man things have become insane, parents have gone soft on their kids, kids are manipulating their parents, companies are throwing random shit at us and we are lapping it up with open arms, we are more excited about reality shows and ignore documentaries that show how we are killing ourselves by killing the environment. We have companies throwing insane marketing campaigns at us like just recently I saw a promotion where Kleenex allows you to send 12 tissues to a friend with personalised messages, yeah you can get your shitty message written on tissues and gift it to a friend coz that the thing that any friend would like. Can you imagine how much advantage it gives the douchebags who break up over a text? They can now send a crappy message on a pack of tissues and think its alright, don't believe me....what n watch. Gone are the days when people got excited about buy 1 get 1 free stuff, no sir today its all about buy something get a totally random shit for free which in all probability you won't use and the only reason they are giving it away is because no one bought it in the first place yet we feel happy. We live in an isolated shelter where people are getting bullied online....yes online..go figure! We are living off prescribed medicines and take advice from magazine columns. Something goes slightly wrong in our lives and we let the whole world know yet have a problem making a phone call to a close friend or family to say hello. We have a fight with someone and you know its a big one when one goes on to unfriend/unfollow the other on a social networking site. There are kids aged 12 who are putting their relationship status as complicated on their facebook page....yeah kid you think its complicated at that age you have no clue what you have coming!

So yeah I think the world has gone all looney all of sudden or perhaps it really wasn't that sudden and I was busy with something else and all of sudden I have come to face this insanity and don't get me wrong I thrive on insane shit, the thoughts in my head...were it to be released out all at once, I would surely be taken to the institution but that's besides the point, I still think in comparison my craziness pales when I look at the kids of today and wonder where they are headed with the tantrums, the spoilt attitude and the protected sheltering of their parents. There is still hope though, and that is for me to lead the world. 

Till next time.....keep smiling! :)